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In another study Connolly found that 15% of teens are in dating relationships that are recurrently aggressive and that the violence tends to increase in a second relationship."If you see physical bruises, it is quite serious abuse, but more often it is much more minor." Pushing, shoving, aggressive, and controlling behaviour are more common.Connolly points to the reality that few kids actually rush onto the dating scene.Instead, they spend time in casual group contexts where boys and girls are together.Dating is only one of many possible ways to develop self-esteem."Kids at this age want relationships that are fun, and that can bring them together to learn about boys and girls. Unlike someone in their 30s, young teens want to experience dating from a much less committed and long-term perspective.Putting limits on what kids can do gives them time to understand in a more relaxed and informal setting, while giving them the confidence and skills they will need to move away from group settings.

These behaviors are not healthy at this age and carry both behavioural and physical risks, emphasizes Connolly. "But I didn't start dating until I was 18," says Mom. According to one survey, nearly half of teens between the ages of 11 to 14 years old are dating. More and more parents are faced with this dilemma today.This survey also found that sex is considered a large part of dating by teens.Perhaps even more alarmingly, it also found significant levels of abuse in these relationships.

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